Commonsense, We Hardly Knew Ye

It used to be that the difference between the two political parties merely indicated a divergence when it came to major issues. Today, however, it has come to mean a schism of Grand Canyon proportions between those who possess rational thought and those on the Left.

Liberals believe, in spite of a century’s worth of contradictory evidence, that socialism is a humane and viable economic system. They believe that America is a racist country in spite of the fact that we have an ostensibly black president; a black attorney general, and that two of our last three secretaries of state have been black.

If you’re dumb enough to be a member of NOW, you are also likely to subscribe to the notion that we live in a patriarchal, misogynistic society, where the deck is stacked against women, even though two of those three secretaries of state have been females, as was the last speaker of the House.

Speaking of Nancy Pelosi, did the same person who told us that ObamaCare would have to be passed if we wanted to know what was in it actually have the gall to say that election results, referring to those in 2010, shouldn’t matter so much? I think she should check with her boss before making any future statements because all that this last one did was remind many of us that, shortly after the 2008 election, Obama rudely reminded John McCain that the election was over and, furthermore, that Republicans should sit down, shut up and get out of his way.

But knowing Pelosi as we have come to, nobody should assume she was actually calling for bi-partisanship. Rather, it was merely a roundabout way of asking that they give her back the jumbo jet she had received as a perk of her speakership.

I suppose, if I were a much kinder person, I would sympathize with Ms. Pelosi. After all, one day she had broken through the glass ceiling and was second in line to the presidency, and the next day she was just another grumpy old lady grousing about the good old days. But that’s the way it is here in America. Take her California colleague, Henry Waxman. On Tuesday, he’s the most powerful midget in the nation, on Wednesday, he’s just another garden gnome.

But don’t get me wrong. All the lunatics aren’t in the nation’s capital, although it often seems that way. Out here on the left coast, the California Senate passed a bill that mandates that social studies curriculum in the public schools includes gay history. For good measure, the Federation of Teachers Convention voted to reaffirm their support of convicted cop killer Mumia Abu-Jamal. Keep in mind, these are the people who are teaching your kids, and not only don’t they have to register as child molesters, but you’re paying their salaries.

Even in Washington, fair-minded people have to acknowledge that not all the dipsticks are Democrats. At least not so long as John McCain is still taking up space in the Senate. As if his former partnerships with Russ Feingold and Ted Kennedy weren’t bad enough, the village idiot has now gone into business with John Kerry. Together, they make a very strange horse, one with a single head but two behinds. Their “Commercial Privacy Bill of Rights” (the gaudier the title, the dumber the legislation), would prevent individuals from suing companies that covertly gather personal information and sell it to interested parties. Under their proposed bill, only the FTC or a state attorney general could sue.

Instead of constantly having to reach across the aisle, it would have made far more sense if the ninny from Arizona had been seated all along with his natural allies. For one thing, McCain wouldn’t have risked injuring his rotator cuff from all that reaching. For another, it would have prevented his having been the Republican presidential candidate in 2008.

After all the posturing and political grandstanding over the recent budget battle, it seems that the actual cuts didn’t even amount to the paltry 50 or 60 billion dollars they spent weeks haggling over. Once both parties set aside the smoke and mirrors until the next time they needed them, the actual cuts apparently amounted to $1.49.

I’m afraid that when it comes to playing hardball, the Republicans simply aren’t in the same division, let alone the same league, as Democrats. Partly that’s because the liberals are in control of the MSM, so that when a liberal accuses conservatives of, say, setting out to starve your granny, he can count on the NY Times, the alphabet networks and the numbskulls on The View, to provide him with a gigantic bullhorn and the world’s biggest echo chamber.

But it is also the result of Republican politicians being as gutless as the kid who allows himself to be constantly cowed by the schoolyard bully. The mere notion of being called a racist, a fascist or a homophobe, is enough to send them scurrying for cover like a flock of Chicken Littles. Heck, even I wind up wanting to see these punks pantsed, dumped into a trash barrel or given a well-deserved wedgie.

The sad political fact is that if you give a Democrat an inch, he’ll take a yard. Give a Republican a yard and he’ll resist taking an inch.


©2011 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write Burt!
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Author Bio:

Burt Prelutsky, a very nice person once you get to know him, has been a humor columnist for the L.A. Times and a movie critic for Los Angeles magazine. As a freelancer, he has written for the New York Times, Washington Times, TV Guide, Modern Maturity, Emmy, Holiday, American Film, and Sports Illustrated. For television, he has written for Dragnet, McMillan & Wife, MASH, Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda, Bob Newhart, Family Ties, Dr. Quinn and Diagnosis Murder. In addition, he has written a batch of terrific TV movies. View Burt’s IMDB profile. Talk about being well-rounded, he plays tennis and poker... and rarely cheats at either. He lives in the San Fernando Valley, where he takes his marching orders from a wife named Yvonne and a dog named Angel.
Author website: http://www.burtprelutsky.com/