Coulter, Krauthammer & Me

As many of you know, I spent a good part of 2012 trying to get the Mitt Romney campaign to give me a shot at writing, co-writing or re-writing his speeches. Alas, I never managed to scale the castle wall. So it wasn’t my fault that the only things he said that anyone ever remembered were that 47% of the people would never vote for him and that 20 million illegal immigrants should self-deport.

Over the past 12 or 13 years, I have written over 1,300 articles and six books from a conservative perspective, but every time I turn around, it’s Ann Coulter or George Will or some shmoe from the NY Times who is being quoted on talk radio or over at Fox News.

Charles Krauthammer writes a book that is basically old columns with a smidgen of autobiography mixed in, and it immediately goes to number one at Amazon. However, my last book, “67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die” includes an interview with Krauthammer in which he discusses his own story at length. But in addition, I got him to talk about the book that has had the greatest influence on him; his favorite movies; his favorite columnists; the eight people, living or dead, he would invite to a dinner party and the role that religion plays in his life.

What’s more, the book also includes equally fascinating interviews with the likes of Rick Santorum, Gary Sinise, Phyllis Shlafly, Hugh Hewitt, Newt Gingrich, Walter Williams, Rick Perry, Andrew Breitbart, David Limbaugh, Pat Boone, Ralph Peters, Paul Ryan, Pat Robertson, Bernard Goldberg, Michele Bachmann, Pat Sajak, Mike Gallagher, Joe Wambaugh, myself and 47 others. Still, after a year, and even after it became available on Kindle, fewer than 500 copies have been bought.

Why am I complaining? Well, for one thing, I can use the money. But for another, the Republican Party needs as much help as it can get, just as Mitt Romney did. And the help it gets shouldn’t be totally dependent on who gets to show up on Fox and whom Rush Limbaugh deigns to mention.

There is a war on in the United States, and I feel like one of those guys during WWII who couldn’t enlist because he had flat feet. Only I don’t have flat feet. And just as there were those left on the sidelines who wanted more than anything to kill Nazis, I want the largest possible podium from which to ridicule Obama and his Marxist toadies. I want to make the whole bunch of them the laughingstocks they deserve to be.

Speaking of which, some dopes have actually tried to put a good face on the fact that Obama hasn’t fired Kathleen Sebelius. They want to pretend it’s because he has so much loyalty to his friends and colleagues. They insist that’s the same reason he didn’t fire Eric Holder over Operation Fast & Furious or any of Hillary Clinton’s State Department flunkies who had anything to do with the massacre at Benghazi.

It isn’t loyalty with Obama. It’s the psychological failing of a narcissist who simply can’t bring himself to acknowledge he made a mistake in the first place, giving authority to people even less competent than himself.

What makes liberals so despicable isn’t simply that they’re wrong on all the major issues; it’s that they are such insufferable hypocrites. For instance, they will always voice their support for higher taxes. But only, you may have noticed, for other people. Why do you think so many movies are shot outside California, either in Canada or southern right-to-work states? Verisimilitude? Not likely, unless you’re one of those people who believe that Toronto looks more like Philadelphia and New York City than Philadelphia and New York City do. The movies leave California for the same rational reason other businesses do: exorbitant taxes!

Finally, it is the height of irony that thanks to all the smart electronic gizmos on the market , never have so many dunderheads had the opportunity to let the entire world know how stupid they are, 140 characters at a time.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Author Bio:

Burt Prelutsky, a very nice person once you get to know him, has been a humor columnist for the L.A. Times and a movie critic for Los Angeles magazine. As a freelancer, he has written for the New York Times, Washington Times, TV Guide, Modern Maturity, Emmy, Holiday, American Film, and Sports Illustrated. For television, he has written for Dragnet, McMillan & Wife, MASH, Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda, Bob Newhart, Family Ties, Dr. Quinn and Diagnosis Murder. In addition, he has written a batch of terrific TV movies. View Burt’s IMDB profile. Talk about being well-rounded, he plays tennis and poker... and rarely cheats at either. He lives in the San Fernando Valley, where he takes his marching orders from a wife named Yvonne and a dog named Angel.
Author website: http://www.burtprelutsky.com/
  • brickman

    If you sell a copy to each of the spouses, parents , grand parents and adult children of the people you profiled, you’ll double your sales.

  • plsilverman

    a “fascinating” interview with Andrew Breitbart, the video hoaxter?

  • D Parri

    Burt, just a thought for you. I share some of those same desires in seeking retribution upon the liberal left loonies that you mentioned.

    It is ok for me to state my penchant for paybacks in very clear terms–mainly because I’m not trying to sell or promote anything. I think it works differently for you because the impact of not openly ‘taking the high road’ makes you more a doggedly ‘in the trenches’ kind of guy. To maintain a view that appears to be above it all requires that you stay out of the trenches–if at all possible.

    Keep writing, keep sharing, and above all…keep up the good fight!

  • Wheels55

    Burt, you should be on TV!!

    I think the reason Holder, Sebelius and even knuckleheads like Martin Bash-her are not fired is because the far left want this kind of service: In your face liberal policies where failure to do what you say is the norm. They really must want and expect most of America to accept what they do or don’t do as if it is the new norm. It’s like saying the sun was in my eyes, but that’s OK since I am a minority.

  • Joe Adams

    Love you Bernie. Hang in there. I like your spots on Fox and think you represent fairly well. Only thing, you always look as if you just finished a bottle of Maalox.

    I kind of liked Coulter years ago, but lately she comes off as another grasping TV pundit, desperate for attention with no real reason to be there.

    • Joe Adams

      Bernie, your blog is an extremely valuable service for “Silent America”, the great mass of Americans that take care of their spouse, raise respectful children, go to work everyday, and pay the taxes that support their country. Obamacare may provide the wake up necessary to vocalize this group against Democrat plans for socialist succession here.

    • Stimpy

      Joe, I think you just made Burt’s point about being ignored. Burt wrote this, not Bernie.

  • Peter Castle

    Coulter cannot be trusted. All of her words and actions are deliberately
    designed to bring her glory, as noted in this free PDF book, Vanity: Ann Coulter’s Quest for Glory,
    at http://www.CoulterWatch.com/vanity.pdf.

  • jespasinthru

    Charles Krauthammer is one of my literary idols. He overcame his physical limitations to become an intellectual superstar. That’s why his books always become bestsellers, and even libraries all over the country are clamoring for copies of every book he writes. And that’s why he’s such a prominent talking head on Fox News. When Krauthammer talks, people listen.

  • Brian Fr Langley

    To be fair to Coulter (I haven’t read Krauthammer) she adds a dash of something more than opinion. (we all have opinions, and we all agree this civilization seems hell bent for, well, hell) That something she adds is, some extremely well documented facts about these bizarre (as bugs bunny calls em) maroons on the left. Plus her language (which does go beyond the pale) is hard to criticize. For example she calls Bill Clinton a “felon”! Then documents it. Meaning he can’t sue her if she’s telling the truth. Opinion is one thing, documenting these nut bars, is another. PS hard to believe, that the media still slobbers over a guy (Clinton) who’s morals seem at best criminal, and at worst sociopathic.

  • Gratefulconservative

    I would love to see you do what Newt threatened to do had he been nominated to run against BhO. He was going to show up right behind him and give a political speech at every stop. I would love to read an article from you, answering every political speech potus gives since that is all he knows how to do. I guarantee it would start a trend. And oh yeah, I also share mostly all of your articles with my facebook friends. Didn’t know about your book but intend on buying it asap.

  • sjangers

    This is something I’ve been meaning to speak with you about for a while now, Burt: the importance of style over substance. You’re clearly a very deep thinker and talented writer, but you don’t seem to care enough about your image. When it comes to intelligence and conservative credentials, you can hold your own with Krauthammer and Coulter. And funny?!!! Neither can hold a candle to you! Out of necessity, I recently purchased a box of adult undergarments so I can ‘gear up’ before I read your columns.

    But the quality of your work won’t mean a lot to the general public until you get people to pay attention to you. I’ve been trying to come up with a good, attention-getting nom de plume for you- maybe something with a cool-sounding title- but the best I’ve been able to do so far are Col. Steele Lybsmasher and Judge Dread Razorwit (with apologies to 2000 A.D.). Neither seems to quite convey the image I think would work best for you, but we ought to keep working on the idea. The alternative is to pick up a blond wig and a slinky red cocktail dress so we can get you all tarted up before we send you out on the talk show circuit.

  • http://johndalybooks.com/ John Daly

    Hi Burt. As someone who’s been promoting his own book for almost six months now, I can tell you that they key is to market the hell out of it.

    We don’t have the kind of public platform people like Charles Krauthammer and Ann Coulter do, so we have to be very pro-active in getting the word out about our books however we can.

    I would suggest that you create a Facebook fan page (not just a group) and include a link to it in your profile here on this website. Do the same with your Twitter page (I see that you already have one). The key to getting people to follow you on Twitter is to follow them. Follow as many like-minded conservatives as you can find and they’ll follow you back. Then, you’ll have a bigger audience to promote your books to whenever you tweet.

    Run an advertisement for your book(s) with each of the columns on this website. If you notice, I have one toward the bottom of every column I write here.

    If you’re in a position to do so, set up book signings. If there are conservative events in your neck of the woods (even tea party rallies), see if you can do a book booth there to sell your books.

    Since my book is a fiction novel that has nothing to do with politics, I’d imagine you’d have even better luck with the conservative demographic than I’ve had.

    All of this stuff really does help

    If you want to get an idea of some of the social media stuff I’ve been doing, here are some links to my pages:
    https://www.facebook.com/JohnDalyAuthor
    https://twitter.com/JohnDalyBooks

    Please let me know if you have any questions too! I’d be more than happy to help anyway I can.

    John

    • http://johndalybooks.com/ John Daly

      Another tip: Do a giveaway for a signed copy of your latest book on Goodreads.com. That will generate interest in your book, and compel people to add your book to their “To Read” list.

  • rJones

    Burt, get the Book on the App store at Apple and I will buy it, read it, and recommend it to my friends……..

  • Royalsfan67

    Hey Burt, I do my part. I share almost every article you write on facebook, and have turned a certain individual on to you. Her name is Julie White-McCarty. I told her about Rick Santorum and she became such a great supporter her and her husband began traveling the country with his campaign and they became great friends. She is head of Tarrant County Tea Party. She was also one of the Texas delegates that led the revolt against the changing of the rules at the republican convention in 2012. She was interviewed at the scene and her interview went viral on the web. She is now invited on Greta quite often. I keep telling her she has to run for the house one of these days, but for now she is content to work within the state of Texas to keep electing true conservatives and exposing those who are in office just for the title and perks.

    She has already shared a paragraph or two of yours on FB, look out, she has a lot of followers. You never know, sales might explode.

  • Porkbevr

    Don’t get too discouraged, Burt. I for one enjoy your writing and look forward to your articles. I’ll make it a point to look up your published books and purchase them to finish up my Christmas lists with like minded conservatives.