Sharia Law, American Style

It’s liberals who are always accusing conservatives of sticking their noses into places where they don’t belong. Being liberals, those places nearly always involve s-e-x.

For instance, when left-wingers push for same-sex marriages, abortions on demand for teenagers and tax-funded birth control pills, and conservatives push back, the Left condemns the Right for meddling in personal matters, ignoring the fact that they’re the ones who insist on putting these things into their party’s platform.

In the meantime, it’s liberals who insist on controlling everything from soda pop consumption to Christmas. Consider that Michael Bloomberg, the dwarf nanny of New York City, has come out in favor of a mosque at Ground Zero, but has waged a holy war against sugar, salt and large containers of Coke. Rahm Emanuel, who confuses his job as mayor of the murder capital of America with bring a nutritionist, spends his time making sure that Chicago’s vending machines not offer anything people might actually want to eat. Barack Obama lives up to his name by discouraging any references to Islamic terrorism, even going so far as to dismiss Major Hasan’s jihadist-inspired killing spree at Fort Hood as workplace violence, and making sure that the guy responsible for producing the video mocking Mohammad was tossed in the clink.

And, of course, any soldier caught trashing a Koran or talking trash to any of the Muslim terrorists stashed at Gitmo can expect to be court-martialed.

In the aftermath of the election, a number of so-called conservatives blasted Mitt Romney for telling the truth, or at least a big part of the truth regarding the reason he lost the election. It’s no secret that politicians always run a terrible risk when they stop mincing their words, but you don’t expect them to be bushwhacked by members of their own party. But no sooner had Romney explained that he couldn’t overcome all the bribes in the form of welfare, cell phones and food stamps, doled out by Obama’s administration, than he found himself being mugged by the likes of Chris Christie, Bobby Jindal and George Will. Aside from the fact that these are the last three guys who would have been chosen by either captain of a junior high school sports team, have they no idea how silly they sound with their self-righteous blather?

Among voters earning less than $30,000-a-year, Obama received seven million more votes than Romney. Do Christie, Jindal and Will, really think they voted for Obama because they approved of same-sex marriage, his foreign policy or Michelle’s crusade against cookies?

That reminds me that Republicans who think that if their candidates reach out to Hispanic voters by letting them know that they are the party that cares about religion and family values and opposes abortion, the Latinos will flock to them in 2014, 2016 and forevermore, they’re merely displaying their ignorance. While it’s true that there’s a segment of that group, 29% in the recent election, who care about such things, the majority doesn’t. And they wouldn’t have changed their vote even if Marco Rubio had replaced Paul Ryan on the ticket. For one thing, Rubio is of Cuban heritage, a heritage that is quite different from that of Mexicans, Guatemalans and Puerto Ricans.

For another thing, the majority of Hispanics do not, like former waves of immigrants, come to America with the idea of assimilating. Also, unlike the immigrants who came here from Europe and Asia, they do not place a high premium on getting an education. And even if they did, thanks to the evil known as bilingual education, their kids are often left in the dust by the competition. It’s no wonder that the drop-out rate from high school for Hispanics is as high as it is. And if there weren’t a law against it, they would drop out of grammar school.

No other group of immigrants has resisted assimilation the way these people have. And instead of it being viewed as a national tragedy, the pinheads who promote cultural diversity regard it as a reason to celebrate. But, then, it’s not their kids who wind up having to flip burgers, mow lawns or peddle drugs.

As for the much-vaunted religiosity of Hispanics, old women may still attend church regularly. Young Hispanics, however, prefer spending their time in other ways, which has resulted in a 50% illegitimacy rate in their community. Still below that of blacks, but give them time; they’re pretty new at it when it comes to women raising kids on their own.

Of the three Republican thugs who fell on Romney, the worst, as you might expect, is the gargantuan Chris Christie, who was last seen strolling hand-in-hand with Barack Obama the week prior to the election. One could have gotten the idea that the two found each other as a result of filling out eHarmony questionnaires. After all, it seems they both like cheeseburgers and ice cream cones and moonlight walks through hurricane-ravaged communities.

Apparently, they also both have a soft spot in their hearts for questionable Islamics. Christie has appointed four schmucks to his Muslim Outreach Commission that should be reason enough to trigger an FBI investigation into his own connection to scumbags. The four include Imam Mohammad Qatanani, whose deportation is sought by the Department of Homeland Security for his failure to disclose on his green card application that he was arrested by the Israelis in 1993 for his ties to Hamas; along with Ahmed Shedeed, Mohammed Younes and Imam Abdul Basit, all of whom have direct links to Hamas and/or the Muslim Brotherhood.

In response to Romney stating that it was Obama’s gifts to minorities and young voters that cost him the election, honorable Imam Christie had the gall to bloviate: “You can’t expect to be a leader of all the people and be divisive. You have to talk about themes, policies that unite people, and play to their aspirations and their goals and their hopes for their family and their neighbors.”

It so happens Romney did exactly that.

The problem is that, for the majority of blacks, Hispanics and young white morons, what they aspired to was free stuff.

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Author Bio:

Burt Prelutsky, a very nice person once you get to know him, has been a humor columnist for the L.A. Times and a movie critic for Los Angeles magazine. As a freelancer, he has written for the New York Times, Washington Times, TV Guide, Modern Maturity, Emmy, Holiday, American Film, and Sports Illustrated. For television, he has written for Dragnet, McMillan & Wife, MASH, Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda, Bob Newhart, Family Ties, Dr. Quinn and Diagnosis Murder. In addition, he has written a batch of terrific TV movies. View Burt’s IMDB profile. Talk about being well-rounded, he plays tennis and poker... and rarely cheats at either. He lives in the San Fernando Valley, where he takes his marching orders from a wife named Yvonne and a dog named Angel.
Author website: http://www.burtprelutsky.com/
  • ELWOOD P SUGGINNS BR549

    WE NEED SHARIA LAW TO KEEP THE WOMEN ACTING RIGHT, NO DRIVING,
    NO VOTING, THATS WHY OBUMMER WON.

  • Michael

    Great column, Burt. I needed a good laugh, and the imagery of Obama and Christie linking up for burgers and ice cream did the trick. As for the Republican Party, it is a mess. I keep hearing what a deep bench they’ll have for 2016, but I don’t see it. I had high hopes for Jindal, but he lost my vote when he threw Romney under the bus. Now he sounds like just another pandering political weasel.

  • JohnInMA

    I haven’t met a progressive yet who was willing to engage in a discussion – many are not as they feel anyone who disagrees is inferior or not worth their time – who wouldn’t admit that they see the role of government and laws as one of culture management (my term). In other words, the ‘thinkers’ within that ideology truly believe in the government’s role in analyzing, deciding, and enforcing all that is good for society. If they deem something is bad it MUST be controlled or modified. Many honestly believe that situations such as the obesity epidemic are inherently going to happen because of how they view the populace.

    Most will not engage in any free will or independence matters. So, I’ve never been able to figure out how they work that into their ideology/view of mankind. Neither will any I’ve come across allow a chat about what actually fosters the end results (poverty, obesity, etc.) So, I’ve always concluded that progressives essentially must have full control of all aspects of life/society/culture in order that there is never a lack for a new cause or new victim for focus. They seem to rarely care about root causes, and only the next rules to force a remedy. It also explains to me why the progressive solution is almost always more of whatever is not working so well. More money, more rules/regulation, more, more, more. How often do you hear a progressive talk about modifying any existing program, for example? It’s always an expansion or a new program.

    Are we really surprised that such progressives cannot find it in their hearts to criticize Sharia, for example? They simply believe they have a better worldview and Sharia type solution, in so many words. And so we find more examples in our society.

  • RickonhisHarleyJohnson

    Another great column, Burt. As for Chris Christie, he was just playing for re-election. When something of that magnitude happens, mayors and governors get hammered. He didn’t want that to happen to him, and didn’t give a damn about either Romney or the United States.

    You are absolutely right about the Mexicans, Puerto Ricans, and Guatemalans today. Cubans came here for the same reason many of our ancestors did, freedom and the opportunity that came with it. Many Mexicans in the small town where I grew up were first generation Americans, or immigrants as children. Their parents came for the same reason.

    I keep wondering what has happened since then. Was it Johnson’s ‘Great Society’? Well, it’s not looking so great these days.