The View From the Left Coast

It’s a toss-up whether more anguish is caused by California or Washington, D.C. The easy answer is the latter. After all, that’s the place where they pass all those loony laws and lumber us with all those economy-destroying regulations.

California, on the other hand, is the place where more than 10% of the nation’s population resides. It is the state that elects the likes of Nancy Pelosi, Barbara Boxer, Dianne Feinstein, Maxine Waters, Henry Waxman, Brad Sherman, Barbara Lee, Gavin Newsom and Jerry Brown.

Moreover, it is often the petri dish for many of the goofier ideas that eventually infect the rest of the country. To its eternal shame, it is also the place that makes multi-millionaires of schnooks like Susan Sarandon, Jane Fonda, Alec Baldwin, Sean Penn, George Clooney, Will Ferrell, Jamie Foxx, Whoopi Goldberg and Tim Robbins, enabling them, in turn, to donate tens of millions of dollars to the DNC.

The odd thing about us is that although we constantly elect Democrats, granting them super majority status in the state senate and state assembly, we occasionally vote for sensible propositions. Some of the things we’ve voted for include capital punishment, an end to welfare benefits for illegal aliens and for marriage to be limited to one man and one woman. But all it’s ever taken to over-rule the will of the people is for those on the Left to hunt up an accommodating judge; to be fair, sometimes it requires five noodle-headed judges.

Here in California, we have more environmental zealots per square inch than anywhere outside the monthly meeting of the Sierra Club or the office of the EPA. That means every wealthy nutjob in L.A. and San Francisco opposes the Keystone Pipeline, oil drilling in Alaska and digging for coal anywhere. It also compels them to compare energy producers to jihadists, and to call oil companies greedy when it’s the politicians who have piled 73 cents in taxes on every single gallon of gas sold in this state.

But the foolishness doesn’t end there. The L.A. Unified School District will use a $37 million state grant to train teenagers to promote ObamaCare to their parents. On the plus side, it will give conservative parents a perfect excuse to sit the young ones down and explain why ObamaCare is evil, why using kids to promote propaganda is reminiscent of life in Nazi Germany and the Soviet Union and why their allowances are being cut in half.

In other news, further proof that our legal system is every bit as bad as our education system can be found in the Sanford, FL, courtroom where even FBI specialists are insisting that they can’t determine from the 911tapes whether it’s Trayvon Martin or George Zimmerman who can be heard repeatedly calling for help. While I acknowledge I’m not an expert, I would think that when one person has a bloody head that shows every sign of having been bashed several times on the sidewalk and the other person has no wounds aside from a bullet hole, it would be pretty obvious who’s who on the tape.

Trayvon Martin’s parents now claim that there was nothing racial in the encounter between their son and Mr. Zimmerman. Funny how that tune has changed since the days when they kept appearing with Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson, claiming that their son, the dope-dealing thug, was the victim of white racism. But perhaps that’s because prosecution witness Rachel Jeantel, whom I assume will soon be hosting an afternoon talk show on MSNBC, testified that her boyfriend called Zimmerman a “creepy-ass cracker,” confirming that America — black America, that is — continues to keep racial hatred alive and well in the hood.

In the meantime, Egypt provides us with a fine example of democracy at work. The people elected Mohamed Morsi president, believing him to be a secular moderate. When they discovered that he was in league with the Muslim Brotherhood and a despot in the making who intended to turn their secular nation into a theocratic state like Iran, they rioted. And the Egyptian Army, to its credit, supported them. I wonder if they would consider helping us out over here.

As usual, when the people rise up against sharia law, be it in Iran in 2009 or today in Egypt, Michelle’s husband remains aloof. It’s no wonder that so many people assume he’s a closet Muslim. Considering how reluctant he is to oppose evil, you have to wonder how he would have handled World War II. Would he really have dared confront Hitler? Would he even have taken up arms against Japan or would he have argued that having our naval fleet in Pearl Harbor was needlessly provocative?

I have to laugh when the Democrats insist that the IRS wasn’t working to help re-elect Obama when it targeted conservative groups. What’s fascinating is that these IRS-deniers have a great deal in common with Holocaust-deniers. For one thing, both groups insist that you ignore provable facts. For another, although both groups grow indignant when accused of counterfeiting reality, the latter were all in favor of exterminating Jews and the former devoutly wish that the IRS could do the same to Republicans. In other words, they deny that either event ever occurred, but they sure as heck wish it had.

In Texas, they were having demonstrations because the state legislature wanted to ban abortions once the pregnancy was more than 20 weeks along. Senator Wendy Davis, who has replaced Sandra Fluke in the hearts of loco feminists, even went so far as to filibuster for 13 hours in order to prevent a vote from being taken. A question that neither she, even after 13 hours of yakking, nor any other pro-death proponent has bothered to explain is why it should take any woman more than five months to make up her mind to murder her baby.

As an aside, I do wonder why people such as Ms. Davis and Sen. Rand Paul garner so much respect and attention as a result of delivering a filibuster. After all, what most normal people want from politicians is less hot air, not more.

Speaking of politicians, Congress has set aside 250,000 tax dollars in order to promote safe sex practices among male prostitutes. Call me a cynic, but I can’t help thinking that a lot of congressmen have more than a passing interest in pushing this federally-funded program.

Finally, as it is always my wish not only to entertain, but to inform, I recently came across a word I hope will soon become commonplace. It seems that liberals suffer from a condition known as mumpsimus, which is defined as adherence to or persistence in erroneous beliefs out of habit or obstinacy.

The condition is such a grave danger to the health of the nation you would have thought that the Center for Disease Control would have taken steps long before now to curb this epidemic by quarantining the progressives in all 50 states.

But I guess they’re just too busy trying to make sure male hookers don’t give our distinguished congressmen anything worse than a hickey.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Author Bio:

Burt Prelutsky, a very nice person once you get to know him, has been a humor columnist for the L.A. Times and a movie critic for Los Angeles magazine. As a freelancer, he has written for the New York Times, Washington Times, TV Guide, Modern Maturity, Emmy, Holiday, American Film, and Sports Illustrated. For television, he has written for Dragnet, McMillan & Wife, MASH, Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda, Bob Newhart, Family Ties, Dr. Quinn and Diagnosis Murder. In addition, he has written a batch of terrific TV movies. View Burt’s IMDB profile. Talk about being well-rounded, he plays tennis and poker... and rarely cheats at either. He lives in the San Fernando Valley, where he takes his marching orders from a wife named Yvonne and a dog named Angel.
Author website: http://www.burtprelutsky.com/
  • Ernie kaputnik

    In regards to the abortion issue, I find it very telling that leftists and feminists are in favor of abortion (regardless as to length of gestation) and at the same time rabidly against the death penalty (regardless as to the depravity of the crime). They are essentially in favor of murdering the most helpless and innocent human beings while in favor of protecting the most vile and blood-thirsty monsters. I need no further proof or demonstration as the inherent evil of the minds of leftists and feminists.

  • 49corvette

    To quote Berry Gordy Jr.—”It’s What In The Grooves That Count”—stay with it—my2cents—thanx for reading

  • Darren Perkins

    Finally, a column I can agree with Burt. Now if I can just get you to realize that privacy is important in our society and the government has no right to spy on it’s citizens without probable cause…

  • helplessinil

    Enjoyable read, thank you. Here in Illinois our politicians made a law last year that prohibits necrophilia. I guess one of our congressmen got caught with a dead male prostitute and their political opponent got pissed when they found out there was no law against it. Remember, if you ever spend the night in Galesburg, IL don’t beat the rats with a baseball bat or you could be fined $1,000.

  • Wheels55

    Egypt is why we have the Second Amendment. Obama saying he will go around Congress to do what he wants makes him Morsi Junior. So, we truly do need the Second Amendment. People who want gun control because of movie theater shootings and neighborhood watch people forget the true purpose of the Second Amendment.

  • souvoter

    Wow; very powerful, Burt. California may have a few sensible souls left but the nutty democrats better beware; look what they did to Detroit and potus swore to save from bankruptcy! This from the Florida coast…….