Unfair and Unbalanced

When Jack Finney’s book, “Invasion of the Body Snatchers,” was made into a movie in 1956, a lot of people insisted that it was an attack on McCarthyism. I don’t know. I was a fan of the late Mr. Finney’s novels, but I know nothing about his politics. To my mind, the pods were Communists.

To me, the book and the movie both foreshadowed the way that leftists move from place to place, tainting the political landscape as they go. For instance, Californians moved north and, as a result, today Oregon and Washington are as far to the left politically as they are geographically. In the East, Manhattanites migrated, and as a result New England might as well call itself Upper New York.

In other parts of the country, the demographics are being drastically altered by illegal aliens. These days, the pods are off the trucks and they’re everywhere. Unfortunately, they don’t all have the distinguishing little X on the back of their necks, but you can easily recognize them by the silly things they say and do.

For instance, Juan Williams is not only convinced that Eric Holder has done nothing wrong, but, on the off-chance that he may have inadvertently done something untoward, believes that Eric Holder is the very best person to investigate Eric Holder. And for those kinds of observations, Fox News is paying him millions of dollars. One has to suspect that Williams has photos of Roger Ailes playing footsies with a sheep named Mildred.

Speaking of photos, we have now seen so many of Barack Obama and Chris Christie strolling along hand-in-hand, looking like an eHarmony commercial, that I keep expecting Michelle to file divorce papers, naming Christie as the other whale.

During one of their recent dates, Chris and Barack visited some sort of fair. It seems that Barack tried to win Chris a stuffed bear by tossing a football through a hoop. He gave up after five tries. At which point, Chris proved to New Jersey voters that he has what it takes to be governor by successfully tossing one through a hole as big as himself.

What I’m trying to figure out is why Obama doesn’t conceal his athletic ineptitude the way he does his college application, his grades and the role that Valerie Jarrett, aka Cruella De Vil, plays in his administration. I mean, this is a narcissist and egotist of record proportion, and yet he’s let us see how badly he shoots basketballs, tosses footballs and throws baseballs. He has even admitted that he bowls in the 30s. I can only assume that it’s his way of trying to tie up that enormous bloc of voters who have secretly resented jocks ever since they failed to get a date to their high school prom.

Some pods even manage to become judges. Down in Florida, Judge Debra Nelson has ruled that George Zimmerman’s attorney won’t be allowed to mention that Trayvon Martin had a record of violence, drug use and school suspensions. Somehow, I would think all of those things would be relevant in a case where the defendant claims he was fighting for his life, and where the media has insisted on using Martin’s baby pictures in their coverage of the case.

One of the most annoying things about having to share the planet with liberals is that they are so willing to lie, cheat and even make fools of themselves in pursuit of their agenda. I first became aware of this inclination several years ago when I was reading a book review in the New Yorker. Although the book in question had nothing to do with politics, I suddenly came across a paragraph in which the reviewer let us know that George W. Bush was a numbskull. It was so clumsy and so inappropriate that I actually thought it was one of those typographical glitches that sometimes take place when a section from one article somehow winds up in another.

But when I pointed it out to my wife, she said that even women’s magazines were insulting Bush in the course of articles allegedly devoted to fashion, architecture and entertainment.

I finally had my fill of this crap and wrote the following letter to novelist Paul Auster: “A few years ago, Woody Allen produced a pretty good movie titled ‘Midnight in Paris.’ It could have been even better if he had been able to resist sticking some unfunny, out-of-character, lines in the mouth of his hero, an apolitical fellow portrayed by Owen Wilson who, a couple of times, apropos of absolutely nothing happening on screen, insults conservatives.

“I just finished reading your novel ‘The Brooklyn Follies,’ and had a similar reaction. Your Nathan Glass is a wise and tolerant man who has good things to say about all kinds of people, and remains tolerant of all sorts of human failings throughout the novel…except when it comes to conservatives.

“Mr. Glass, so far as we can tell, doesn’t even vote. He certainly doesn’t do anything to help his beloved Democrats get elected. He doesn’t even stuff envelopes or make phone calls, but he’s quite willing to dismiss all conservatives as racists and fascists, and to hold George Bush in the sort of contempt most normal people reserve for the likes of Hitler, Stalin and Mao.

“You are entitled to hold whatever cockeyed beliefs you like, but you can’t tar half of your fellow Americans as scumbags and not, in turn, deserve to be labeled a narrow-minded bigot. And what’s more, you can’t put those beliefs in the mind and the mouth of your protagonist and not be written off as a hack.

Sincerely, Burt Prelutsky”

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Author Bio:

Burt Prelutsky, a very nice person once you get to know him, has been a humor columnist for the L.A. Times and a movie critic for Los Angeles magazine. As a freelancer, he has written for the New York Times, Washington Times, TV Guide, Modern Maturity, Emmy, Holiday, American Film, and Sports Illustrated. For television, he has written for Dragnet, McMillan & Wife, MASH, Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda, Bob Newhart, Family Ties, Dr. Quinn and Diagnosis Murder. In addition, he has written a batch of terrific TV movies. View Burt’s IMDB profile. Talk about being well-rounded, he plays tennis and poker... and rarely cheats at either. He lives in the San Fernando Valley, where he takes his marching orders from a wife named Yvonne and a dog named Angel.
Author website: http://www.burtprelutsky.com/
  • souvoter

    ‘Without Truth, there can be no reason’ was a profound quote I heard the other night. Seems to me this describes the democrat party to a T…..

  • Todd Zaino

    Burt, your “the other whale” made me spit coffee all over my Dell…thanks a lot!

  • Brian Fr Langley

    A lot of these issues (particularly on morality) are a matter of perspective. For most conservatives (though not all) they believe that some things are right and some things are wrong. They hold this view (rightfully so I believe) despite current circumstances. The left on the other hand seems to think “the ends justifies the means” Changing circumstances may mean doing a little bad, for a larger good. The truth is, both ethics have some merit. If for example you favored dropping nuclear weapons to end WW2, you to believe, that sometimes “the ends justifies the means”. Unhappily uncoupled from traditional religious norms, and subsequently recoupled to a socialist ethos the “end justifies the means” becomes (in short order) a recipe for corruption.

  • Wheels55

    The whole Trayvon Martin – George Zimmerman deal is a joke. The media loves to make someone the bad guy. Using 4 year old pictures of Martin was lousy journalism. Lost in this joke is the fact that had BOTH guys walked away, nobody would be dead nor on trial.

    Speaking of jokes, Juan Williams certainly has become one. I know Fox likes to hire people on the left so that we all get a balanced view of the world. But Juan simply cannot stop blindly loving Holder and Obama. Juan, grow a pair and say what you truly want to say: that this administration has so many clouds over their heads we all expect Noah to build another arc.

    • legal eagle

      If you cant figure out by now that Juan Williams is playing a role on Fox News debates then you are delusional….These shows are like debating contests….This is show biz not personal opinion…..Juan is paid a reported $750k per year to play whatever role they ask him to…When he hosts the O’Reilly show he’s a right winger…when he’s in a debate he’s a left winger….It’s like pro wrestling…FAKE

      • Wheels55

        I realize that all opinion talk shows have some acting. But Juan does say some very left things that he probably believes, at least a little. However, for $750,000 per year, I would probably say I love Obama and Holder too.

        I do like your reference to pro wrestling – that truly seems to be the case on O’Reilly’s show. Bret Baer’s show seems to entice more truthful responses from that panel. Williams still says some lefty stuff there.

        • legal eagle

          Some acting? The people in these debates are told what positions to take in order to get the maximum conflict….This is show biz….

  • Royalsfan67

    I love what you said about they are willing to lie and cheat in defense of their cause. I once dated a girl, turned out she was a lib. (Didn’t last long). There was a proposal in Missouri to lower the alcohol content for DUI to .08%. Mothers against Drunk Drivers put out a false ad stating you could have 4-5 beers an hour and not test over .08. This was a blatant lie. I brought this to the GF’s attention. She flat out said it was ok to lie if it furthers your cause and you think your cause it just.

    This just shows their mentality. Or lack thereof

    • legal eagle

      Obviously you are still upset that the girl wouldn’t let you in her pants….get over it…..LOL

      • Royalsfan67

        Oops, sorry, tried to have a serious discussion

        • legal eagle

          That’s a serious discussion? You once dated a girl…therefore liberals lie?

          • Royalsfan67

            If that is what you took away from my comment then you are far too stupid to have an intelligent debate. Go back to nursery school and pick on the kids smaller but still smarter than you

          • legal eagle

            Now your defensive and need to call me names? Is MADD a political organization? and why do I give a hoot about what your GF said is OK or not Ok to do? If you have a point make it if you want..